Monday, April 08, 2013
God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it? -Numbers 23:19
this is something that encouraged me today. no matter what changes in my life, my God is unchanging and faithful. no matter what i lose, no matter what happens, my God will always be my God. and i pray that i will remember that that is all that i need. What a priviledge it is to be chosen by God! indeed He is merciful to love an unfaithful and inconsistent person like me.
the verse reminds me yet again that everytime i depend on others or circumstances for happiness, it almost always turns bad. but Lord you never fail me..
im always holding onto the wrong things, hanging onto them for dear life, when You are already holding onto me! all i need to do is to let go, and let Him take control. such a simple analogy, but so difficult ): human nature is always telling me to hold on and pull myself up with my own strength. never realising that hes there to catch me, in a way that nobody else can.
this is a worrysome week. my grandpa is not doing too well, and i think he's going to die soon. i still havent reconciled myself with this fact, because everytime i think about it, i just cant accept it. i want to visit him in hospital everyday, but im extremely tied down by a major studio submission due on monday. and also, everytime i go to hospital, i dont know what to say, and it saddens me that he has come to such a stage that he cant even communicate what he wants to say. his health really deteriorated so fast within a period of a few days, it just makes me so so sad that its his time to go soon ): pray for him, and pray for my family and i too in the grieving ):
i'll be staying in school for the next couple of days (till saturday) so that i can get as much work done as possible. its really depressing to be in school all the time, and its gets really lonely ): even though the computer lab has people, i still cant help but feel so alone and so scared sometimes. random friends chatting me up on facebook really helps to keep the blues away.. even a small hi reminds me that im not forgotten, and i guess its God's way of encouraging me to press on and not to be discouraged in everything that im going through right now.
Nearer, still nearer
Close to thy heart
draw me my Saviour
so precious thou art
Fold me, O fold me close to thy breast
shelter me safe in that haven of rest
Nearer, still nearer
while life shall last
till safe in glory my anchor is cast
through endless ages ever to be
nearer my Saviour
still nearer to thee
avoid the aliens;
9:10 PM
